Today, there will be cookies.
For those of you who are like “Cookies?! You just were at the gym yesterday.”
I have the endurance of a 90 year old woman who just woke up from a ten year coma. Seriously. I have ZERO interest in losing weight or gaining weight. I weigh the same thing I have weighed for years. This was broadcast across the screen of the elliptical machine as a motivator, I guess. I weigh 155 pounds.
I originally planned to do a half an hour. At 1:28 I realized that was not going to happen and that there was a good chance I might die in the gym. I installed spotify on my phone so that was helpful. I only have three songs now, but they are good songs.
I selected the “Total Body” option on the machine and so throughout the time that I was
wishing for my own death working out different messages would suddenly flash across the screen.
PUSH! PUSH! PUSH! PUSH!
Am I in labor again? What’s happening?!
The machine automatically changed up the resistance levels so your body gets a complete workout. I think you have to be there for much longer than 15 minutes. I was at 13:24 and I was reddish purple. I was slightly afraid that I was going to fly of the machine. It was torture. I turned on the most energetic song on my playlist and just kept going.
I brought the machine to a full and complete stop and resisted the urge to fall on the floor. I took my, now led, legs and wiped my machine down and then I made a decision. I am going to do the three personal training sessions that come with my membership. This is ridiculous. I have friends running 5k’s and perfecting their strides and I’m almost dead from 15 minutes of cardio? SERIOUSLY?
Today, I am only a little sore, but instead of leg pain I have tightness in my arms, neck, and back. This is a good thing.
Today, I am going to rest, do more Christmas shopping, and make a batch of Christmas cookies. I need some help recovering.