Monthly Archives: August 2011
After relaxing to the point that I was capable of functioning in a semi-normal capacity we all split up. My dad’s wife Kaye took me to get a pedicure and to have lunch at the Olive Garden. It was lovely. Jack slept through the pedicure, but needed a lot of attention at lunch. It was fun anyway.
The kids went to the Exploreum with my dad at the Gulf Coast Science Center in Mobile. Max had so much fun, he nearly lost his head.
The kids also watched the Hubble IMAX film. They like it an awful lot. I wish I had seen it!
The rest of our time with my Dad was spent playing music, playing on the slip and slide, and laughing a lot. Basically, all the things we wished we could be doing all year round. My Dad cooked excellent dinners. Kaye tolerated a day of Max’s moodiness and days of Jack being surly. We loved it.
Part three will explore our trip to Wiggins, Mississippi!
This year, I decided that since the Summer is the only time I can take the kids to see their family that I would make the trip a priority. I planned to go mid summer, but then my grandfather and father both went into the hospital. We had to wait for everyone to get well enough to receive visitors and then suddenly we were at the end of the summer.
Finally, everyone was well and we were ready. We packed up my Hyundai Accent hatchback and stole away in the middle of the night. We left the house around 2am. (By “We” I mean myself and the children. James had to work and so he stayed home and had a vacation from us.) I drove through the night pumped up on 5 Hour Energy and coffee. Jack slept for most of the trip. Max and Annie stayed up for the whole trip asking helpful things like “Are we there yet?” and “How far is it NOW?” In retrospect, this constant stream of questions probably kept us alive since I was incredibly tired. It had been my intent to eave the house with an almost full night of sleep, but my mom ears were functioning despite the sleeping pill I took, so I really got about 3 or four hours of sleep.
Around 5:30am we decided to stop for breakfast since Jack was awake and unhappy. Unfortunately, we nearest to Quincy which is about as close as possible to the middle of nowhere. There is an exit, but it only leads to other highways. There is a gas station, but it was not open at 5:30 in the morning. We know this because I pulled in hoping to find something and found nothing.
Eventually, we found an exit that had food. It was, of course, the Waffle House. We ate and allowed Jack to bounce around. We had hoped he would sleep most of rest of the way, but no dice. Instead, we sang his current jam which is “The Wheels on the Bus.” Frankly, I’m ready to drive that damned bus off a cliff, but he digs it. We sang this song for the next hour. (I am not kidding.) He then was not amused with the song anymore and so we stopped at a rest stop to let him bounce around. Everyone took one last potty break after I warned them that the only way I was stopping before getting to my dad”s house was if there was an actual death.
We arrived in Daphne, Alabama just as Jack was about to have a mental breakdown. He was not the only one about to lose their mind. I am pretty sure I was a close second. We visited with Dad and Kaye and then Kaye took us to check into our hotel.
Part two to follow. Jack has been sick the past few days making blogging or eating or sleeping nearly impossible.
Several hours ago I returned home from our vacation. I am thoroughly tired, but I have missed my blog so much that I wanted to stop in and tell everyone that I had a wonderful time and that tomorrow or Wednesday I’ll be giving a full update.
The full itinerary covered:
- Daphne, Alabama
- Wiggins, Mississippi
- Pensacola, Florida
A few days ago I saw a commercial for Huggies Lil’ Movers Slip On Diapers. I thought two things.
- Seems like a decent idea.
- Too bad they are made by Huggies, the most expensive diaper brand I can think of.
- Look at the diaper the child is presently wearing. Note where the tabs are.
- While the child roams free (or sits in his play pen or thinks about world peace) spread the diaper out just as you would if you were putting it on the baby.
- Bring the front of the diaper up and place tabs where you saw them in step 1.
- Remove previous diaper, clean child quickly, and then slip the diaper on.
In about 19 hours I will be throwing the children over my shoulder, strapping them into the car, and heading North. We’re going to visit family in LA. Lower Alabama, that is. We’ll also be in Mississippi for a few days. Due to the fact that Jack is an untamed beast that refuses to be caged, I mean sit in his car seat, for more than two hours without crying to the point that he vomits, I’ll be driving through the night.
I do NOT want to drive through the night. However, it’s the only rational and affordable option.
I plan to achieve this fabulous feat by getting up at a ridiculous hour this morning (which happened several hours and a few cups of coffee ago), taking a sleeping pill, and going to sleep early in the evening. The biggest danger here is that I could be too tired and fall asleep before arriving at our destination.
I’ve only fallen asleep while driving once. It was after I returned from one of these up North trips. Luckily, Cameron was with me and as soon as my head drooped and we started heading for the median he screamed like a little girl. Nobody can sleep through that. I pulled over, got a Monster Energy drink, and continued to my mother’s place where I took a brief nap.
I’ll be using the decaf version of 5 hour energy in addition to getting almost a full nights sleep ahead of time. The trip with take a little over eight hours, but I plan to stop for breakfast to let everyone stretch out and get full. Children have a tendency to go all one track mind on you if you fail to feed them in time. I am not dealing with an hour long chorus of “I’M HUUUUUUUNGRY!” simply because I passed the last damned restaurant for a hundred miles. Been there, done that, and I will never willingly do that again.
Now, you’re saying the solution is simple. Just bring food. Of course I will. I’m no rookie. I pity the fool, I mean the parent, who doesn’t bring snacks on a road trip. Children have a unique adaptation ability that allows them to bond with the snack bag and suddenly hate everything that you brought. (I think children have a +1 to Jackassery.) A child that eats more bananas than a monkey will suddenly swear ON HER OWN LIFE that she’s never eaten bananas and she hates, hates, hates them. Realistically, they’re tired, tired of being in my Hyundai Accent Hatchback, and ready to walk their wiggles out (and so am I.)
Once I get through today, we’ll be fine. I, of course, have not packed for myself or Jack. Max and Annie are set. I need to scrub out Jack’s car seat base because it’s kind of gross. I need to vacuum the car, give myself a pedicure, make a batch of cookies for my mother because she is letting me borrow her GPS, acquire Max and Annie, make dinner for everyone before I fall asleep, find a pair of size 15 men’s flips flops, and make sure all electronic devices are charged to capacity. My husband bought me a multi-device car charger this week, but I like to start ahead of the game.
I should have no problems blogging since I’ll have access to a real computer and I’m bringing my Nook Color with me, but I don’t see myself doing a Blog Talk Radio show. I think there will simply be too much chaos. I know you’re all weeping (with relief.)
Goodbye for now, my internet friends. Wish us well!